Conversation With My Husband

((Disclaimer: If you lived under a rock during the year 1999, and/or have never listened to questionable hip hop music... this post will make no sense... I am looking at you, Dad.))

I walk into the TV room... kinda like a penguin... waddle, waddle.

I am squeezing my butt cheeks like there is a $100 bill shoved up there.

"Don't I look better like this?" I ask Husband.

"You walk weird like that."

"Yeh, but don't I look better? My dumps are gone."

"Your dumps?"

"Yeh. Like a truck."

"Your dumps like a truck?"

"Yeh. Thighs like, what, what, what."


"No. Thighs like what, what, WHAT. Three whats."

"What exactly is a 'dump'?"

"This..." I say, grabbing the spot between my butt and my hamstring..."This is a dump."

"That's your upper thigh."

"No... it's a dump."

"I'm pretty sure that's not the medical term."

"I'm pretty sure it is."

"Says who?"

"Says Sisqo."

(Husband leaves room.)


  1. This totally made my day.
    And now I wonder how long the song will be stuck in my head for. The worst part is, this was my favorite song when I was like... 11.

    1. I told my friend this story and she was like... "that song was my jam in 5th grade!" That is so wrong, on so many levels!!

  2. Bahaha yes. I remember learning the dance from the video by watching some show on MTV that taught dances from videos. It made me really cool at school dances.

    1. Your parents must have been so proud!


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