11/28/14

Beauty School Drop Out... Already.

My Girlfriend, that little pain in the neck...

When we put her to bed at night, she literally waits for us to close the door and then jumps out of bed and instantly starts roaming the halls.

I am in a new chapter of parenting these days, especially at 8 o'clock at night...

It's called, "As long as you aren't getting hurt, whatever you are doing is probably fine."

So we kind of let her get her books, or whisper around the corner to her brother, or whatever she's doing, as long as she isn't loud, or getting into trouble... she usually ends up passed out in her bed by 9:30.

Plus, how many times can one person scream get back in your bed without losing their mind?

This is the Mother of Three speaking, if you have been reading since I was a Mother of One you are probably like what the Hell happened to this woman.

Anyway... she ended up in my bathroom and got into my Self Tanner one night.

She's sneaky so she's very quiet when this stuff is happening.

I didn't realize it until she was getting ready for school the next morning and I'm all:

"Uhh... what's up with your feet, Doll?"

And she's all, "Nofing."


Oh, right, nofing.. you just look like you have a skin disease, no big deal.

The very next night, after we did the normal bedtime run around, I went to climb the stairs for bed, and there in front of me is a hunk of hair.


Now, I know damn well that I have only one child with long hair, but for some reason when I saw that hunk of hair I said, "((gasp)) Who cut their hair!!"

And there, at the top of the stairs, was my Girlfriend, who was all: "Not me!"

I reached for the railing, and climbed the stairs with my eyes closed.

If you've been reading for awhile you know I SCALPED my hair when I was three... so I was pretty much petrified that my baby was going to have a buzz cut.

By the time I reached Girlfriend she was all, "I'll show you where the rest of my hair is!"

It wasn't as bad as mine... but it was still a haircut.


She kinda gave herself a Justin Beiber bang do.

She was sobbing and I just couldn't help myself... I became that Mom that takes a picture of her kid while they cry.

I just had to do it, it was freaking funny.

She was like, "Baaaaahhhhh.... don't give me a boy hair cut!!! Bahhhhhhhh..... whose Dustin Beiber!!!!!??"


Classic.

11/26/14

She Said...

Our Elf came back.

Boyfriend about lost his damn mind when he saw him perched up on our book shelf.

He was all, "WONKY WONK!! HE'S BACK! HE'S BACK!"

And from the bathroom, I hear Girlfriend scream, "WAIT FOR ME! I'M POOPING! WAIT FOR ME!"

Mind you, the girl has no clue what the Hell Boyfriend is talking about...

She was just over two last Christmas when Wonky Wonk came back, so she was basically just second hand excited... she really had no idea why she was happy.

Either way, she flew out of the bathroom and was instantly jumping up and down beside her brother screaming, "He's back! He's back!"

Her excitement, however, was short lived... when she realized exactly what Boyfriend was pointing at... she stopped jumping and dead panned him:

"That's a doll."

Her brother was all, "No it's not! He's magic!"

And she's like, "Nope. It's a doll. He's not real."

And with that... she was over it... she left the room, on to the next thing.

It was all I could do not to laugh at them.

She is so her cynical Father and he is so his over excited Mother.

Could be worse I guess!!


Update: Girlfriend is now excited about the Elf... she has no idea why, but she is.

11/10/14

Big Moves or.. Santa's Sneaky Surprise

If you've been reading for a long time... like, forever, then you may remember me talking about how we have rented out an in law apartment in our home for the past six years.

Which means, we have always shared a wall. Everyday that we have been here.

Can you just think about that for a minute?

Let it really sink in.

Think about your own life, with however many kids you have or don't have... and imagine SHARING A WALL... as in... always being careful not to be too loud, yell too much, be too crazy.

You get the idea.

Now that the kids are older... I am pretty damn tired of shushing everybody all the time.

Plus, I recently read this thing that said, "Let them be little..." And when I read it, my, "Mom Guilt," went into over drive...

Because for every minute that I let them, "be little," outside the house... I almost NEVER let them be little when they are near our "shared wall"... and that sucks for them.

I want them to have their own space to create, and relax, and learn... and also... I want all the toys in ONE PLACE.

So when our current tenant said that she has to move out we decided... alright, enough is enough, let's take back our house.

The very scary plan is to walk away from the added income, and reclaim that portion of our home as, our home.

Which it has never been for even one day since we have lived here.

We have never known our home to have it's full square footage, but we will soon.

Although we aren't 100% comfortable with the idea of no longer having that extra money every month, I am even more uncomfortable with having to interview tenants and a share a wall any longer.

The older the kids get, the less I like the idea.

And so... we have decided that Santa will bring a very low budget, "use-what-you've-got," play room.

I am absolutely 100% asking for your expertise in this area!! If you have a "toys only," play room.. PLEASE... tell me what works! And what is a cheap way to get it to function well for our kids!!

Our babies have never known a room that is exclusively for their toys, and instead have toys LITERALLY CRAMMED into every damn spare spot in our house.

But... Santa has spoken, and has suggested bean bag chairs, a wall mounted TV and all the cheap, second hand, toy storage he can get his hands on.

And so... for every single night of the month of December, if you need us... you'll find us quietly sneaking toys into the other side of our house, painting the walls, hanging window treatments... you name it.

And our sweet nosey little cherubs will never know, because we wont tell them that no one is living there.

On Christmas morning.... the plan... is to have big boot prints and Christmas Carols lead the way to a doorway in our home that has always been locked, and insulated with not one, but two doors.

Except on Christmas morning... I'm thinking ribbons... and Christmas lights hanging from the ceiling... maybe an art display and match box car storage.... old toys, new toys, long forgotten toys, wrapped toys, big toys, little toys.....



I honestly have NO IDEA where to begin to make this a functional room for all of us, but I am EXCITED to hear your ideas.

Annnnnnd..... lest I forget that reclaiming that part of our home will mean having my WASHER AND DRYER ON THE FIRST FLOOR... and a FULL EXTRA BATHROOM!!!

Annnnd... a HUMONGOUS CLOSET that has been hiding over there for year and years and is finally, about to become... all ours.

I mean... we might never move now. For real.

I can not wait, wait, wait.

We may be eating Ramen Noodles on Christmas Day.... but Gosh Darn it... our kids will be in a room just for them, full of all the toys in all the land and we... we... WE.....

Will not!!!!!!

IT'S A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE!!!

At least.... I hope it will be.
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