Not The Best Day Ever After All

If Alanis Morrissette was to write a song about my day last Monday, she might say...

"It's like having the best day everrrr.... and then getting all your shit stoleennnn."

Okay, so maybe that doesn't flow off the tongue so well, but I'll be damned if it's not freaking Ironic... that I posted a picture of my dolls and wrote #bestdayever...

And at that same exact moment, someone was using my credit cards across town.


I am not one of those people that brags about having the best life ever... I'm big on being normal, and keeping it real, ya know?

But when I watched my kids and took pictures that day... it really did feel like the #bestdayever.

It didn't feel like I was bragging, it just felt real.

The sun was shining, the kids were throwing rocks... it was freaking GORGEOUS outside.

And then my phone rang... literally two minutes after I took and posted that #bestdayever picture.

It was Irony calling...

Apparently she has an 800 number, and I almost didn't answer.

Except I did.

And she said... Oh hey... this is the USAA fraud department... your credit card has been stolen.


Someone, who had no appreciation for the beautiful weather, opened my car door... which I had accidentally left unlocked... opened my wallet...stole every card except my license... and had a grand old time.

It took them 30 minutes to spend $1500.00.

I say "them," but after the police got survelliance footage we found out it was actually a woman.


Long story short, I sat with the cops for two and a half hours.

One of my friends stayed with me most of the day and I am forever in debt to her for putting her life on hold while I put the pieces of mine back together.

Because on days like that... on days that feel like the #bestdayever and end up being #fuckthisshit .... on days like that.... Husband is traveling for work.

Of course he is.

For the WEEK.

Which meant... I had no cards, no bank account, no TJ MAXX GIFT CARD WORTH $100... nothing.

No way to buy food, no way to pay for gas... NOTHING.

Luckily, my parents took us in (like they had a choice), bought me some gas, and paid for some allergy medicine for Boyfriend.

We stayed with them for nearly the whole week, and when I finally came home, Husband was waiting for me with open arms, a house full of food, and lots of nice things to say about how he will always keep us safe.


I am still waiting for my new check book and bank cards to come in the mail. #takeyourtime

The investigation is on going, and because credit card thieves aren't known for their smarts... the woman only shopped at big name stores (Home Depot, Bed Bath & Beyond, Wal-Mart to name a few...)...

Which means there is tons of video footage of her shopping in her big stupid sun hat, buying gift cards and WICKER FREAKING ROCKING CHAIRS.

At the end of the #bestdayever .... I was penniless, but tons of people had offered to help me.

And my children had been absolute ANGELS while I worked with the police.

I was bummed that I had been foolish enough to leave my car open, and annoyed that I had to make fifty seven phone calls to get my life back in order.

But it didn't end up being the worst day ever, because I got to see first hand that even though there are shitty people in the world, there are some really great and helpful ones too.

Plus, it's only money, and the banks will refund it... so we're all good.

Live, learn, lock your doors.


  1. Wow what a rotten sunhat wearing b*tch. I hope they find her.
    Your parents are amazing for helping out. It would be such a scary situation to be in, especially with young kids. Glad you'll be getting the money back though.

  2. Poor Mama!! I hate that!! I can't believe how completely dumb and heartless people are. But- have I ever told you how great of a writer you are. I'm sure I have. I adore you. Move your family to me so we can be best frands.

  3. oy. it was quick but it sucks


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