Sadness & Gratitude

Our home state is grieving today; in the wake of 26 senseless deaths, at the hand of a sick, sick man.

Of the 26 victims, a horrifying 20, were children.

We are fortunate not to be directly affected by this unthinkable crime on humanity...

But, like everyone else... our hearts are heavy with shock and sadness.

Every part of me aches with sorrow for all that was lost today in Newtown, CT.

My stomach is in knots for the families that were torn apart...

For the parents; who packed lunches, tied shoes, gave kisses and hugs goodbye...

For the children; who spent the last moments of their lives in fear.

And for those courageous teachers, who gave their lives to children, up until their very last breathe.

Today should have been a day like any other for the staff and students at Sandy Hook Elementary...

And now the news is crawling with stories of heroes, and she-roes... stories that, although amazing... should never have had to happen.

I am fearful of this world that we are raising our children in; where we must question our every move.

A world where we must suspect first, and trust second.

The truth is; I think I lost a part of myself today... and maybe you feel that way too.

I will forever be a little more cautious at every turn; because as we learned at Sandy Hook... sadly, nothing is often limits, not even the sanctity of our babies.

How is it possible that even doing the right thing for our children... ends up hurting them, and being wrong?

When school isn't safe... where is??

My soul is shattered for the harmless children that were the target of such horrendous hate, in an environment that they know, love, and trust.

As a Mother, I ache for the parents that dropped their babies off at school this morning, and will go home to empty beds tonight....

I am heart broken and devastated that something so unthinkable could happen anywhere... let alone so very close to home.

Newtown is less than 15 minutes from where Husband and I grew up.

Just one mile down the road from Sandy Hook Elementary, is the Church that we were married in...

...Which at this very minute, is hosting a Candle Light Vigil for hundreds and hundreds of grieving citizens.

Each and every time I look at my children, I am brought to tears..

I am eternally grateful for their warm little bodies... their smiles.. their... everything.

And you know what else...

I'm thankful that they are here to pester me, and terrorize each other...

Because there are so many families out there, that would give anything to have that time back... to hear the bickering amongst siblings.

It is times like these that we remember just how fragile life really is; and we hug a little tighter, smell their hair, and tickle their bellies...

We are the lucky ones... you on your side of the computer; with your kids and chaos... and me on my side with mine.

Our babies are tucked into bed, with their feetie pajamas, and their innocence... and for that I am thankful.

Tonight, I ask you to please, keep the people of Newtown, CT, and children all over the world that are dying senselessly everyday, close to your heart...

Look around your house, at your glowing Christmas Tree, or your lit menorah... and breathe in the love that you and your family have created...

These moments are precious, let's make the most of them... just like our children do.


  1. You said it so much better than I could. I am so angry and confused and hurt and sad and that is absolutely NOTHING compared to what those parents are going through and will live with forever. It's most frightening when something like this hits so close to home and that's crazy that you grew up so close to the school. Ugh. I don't know what else to say. Nothing can fix this. I don't know how shit like this keeps happening, ALL the time but it needs to end now.

  2. Did you see this yet? I'm guessing this is the church you were married in.


    1. I did see it... and I was on the edge of my seat waiting for more news. The priest who runs that church is a wonderful man who baptized me, both bugs, and all of my siblings and cousins... he also married us... He is a very good friend of our family and will be such an asset to those people suffering in Newtown, it would be crime to hurt him or his parish. I am working on building a commune to hide my babies from this crazy ass world... you and Natalie are welcome!

    2. Ugh, I'm hoping that was just some sick ass prank call, which it seems to have been.

      That is crazy that you know the priest and he has been such an important part of your and your families lives.

      Did you grow up in Sandy Hook? I'm wondering if Lovebug and Ladybug would have attended the school when they're older had you stayed in the area?

    3. No we didn't, we grew up 2 towns over... about 15 minutes from Sandy Hook.


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