5/31/12

Just Laughing At My Kids Again..




PS... She's fine.

29 in 29 Update

My Father in Law is super thoughtful, and took the Bugs, Husband, and myself on a ferry ride a few weeks ago, to help me knock something off my list.


It was kind of a Birthday slash Mother's Day slash 29 in 29 combo gift.

I imagined going on a ferry with the kids would be super exciting.

My brain painted the most beautiful picture of fingers pointing at boats off the top deck, sun burned cheeks and friendly Captain's letting us drive the boat.

Not so.... not really so at all, as it turns out.

It was too windy up  top to be able to stand it for more than five minutes... so the whole group of us, (three adults and two babes) sat down below for the hour plus ride.

By the time we got there Lovebug was antsy and jabbing his sister and Husband was sweating.


That's the way it goes in confined spaces with kids... they get crazy and fussy.

Once we arrived at an adorable little island town though, we had a great time.


We had lunch, gave Ladybug her first ice cream cone, and did a little shopping.


My Father in Law bought me a gorgeous sterling silver necklace (see below in Ladybug's chubby paw) at this cool little shop.


It reminds me of pictures I have seen of my mother in college when she was a hippie... (the cool kind, not the dirty kind).

Anyway, the dolls loved the extra time with their Grandpa, and being in a new place together.



Lovebug was super curious about the water and the boats... and Ladybug loved the shit out of her first grilled cheese sandwich.


We somehow missed the ferry on the ride home and ended up an hour off schedule... so it was melt down city for the Bugs.

They needed naps. Bad.


So did I.


 Ever the frat boy... Lovebug refused to pass out until we started our long ride home in the car.

Boyfriend never wants to miss a second of the partay, people.




In case you're wondering... my 29 in 29 list now looks like this:

1- Waterski (I attempted this endlessly as a child and could never stand up on those bloody skis).

2- Sing karaoke in a bar.

3- Watch the Wizard of Oz. (I have never seen it start to finish. I know.)

4- Eat Sushi.

5- Back squat 200 pounds.

6- Do a strict pull up.

7- Plant a garden (and not kill it).


8- Fly in a plane with sky divers (I will not be diving). (I am nervous just typing that)

9- Write letters to my children for them to open on their 18th birthdays.

10- Go on vacation with my husband... just the two of us.

11- Sew a dress for my daughter.

12- Have my writing published... anywhere.

13- Learn to decorate cakes.

14- Take a shot with my Husband.... in almost 5 years of marriage, and 10 years together... we have never done this.

15- Get real henna on my foot.

16- Eat lunch at a Vineyard with my Mom, sisters,and sister in law... actually try a sip of wine.

17- Make homemade ice cream with the Bugs.

18- Make a stepping stone with my family... put it in the garden that I am not going to kill.

19- Re-learn all the continents.

20- Learn the states in alphabetical order.

21- Go up in a stunt (like I did as a high school and college cheerleader...)

22- Learn how to use the grille; cook something on it.

23- Take Lovebug on a Ferris Wheel.

24- Take the Bugs on a Ferry ride (my first).

25- Take a trapeze class.

26- Make a ginger bread house with the Bugs (my first).

27- Learn how to mow the lawn on a tractor.

28- Go snow skiing (I used to do this as a kid, but stopped well before age 8).

29- Play 9 holes of golf, drive the cart.


Only 26 more to go!!

To see other updates, check here.






5/30/12

Wordless Wednesday- Photo Dump
















Happy Birthday to my sweet little man...

I am sad for this milestone, as it pushes you one step closer to being a grown boy.

I am selfish, and wish you'd stay a baby forever.

I will cry buckets the day you no longer ask for "snuggle time".

You have changed my life in so many wonderful ways...

You have shown me what it means to be alive.

You are kind, funny, sweet, loving, loud, messy, energetic, excited, smart, happy...

You have taught me more in three years than I ever knew possible.

You have made the world magic, new and exciting...

You make every day entertaining, and a little crazy.

You are exactly what a little boy should be.

Never change my love. Never change.

I love you now and forever.

5/25/12

Ch-Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes

The Summer has got me antsy for a lighter feel in our house... out with the cozy and in with the cool!!

So... we usually rock these dark blue, thermal, black out curtain and valance jobbies... (minus the Christmas garland attached to them), but with the summer heat finally here, those curtains just had to go.


It's hard to decorate these rooms because I feel like the window treatments all have to match... and I don't want heavy curtains all the way around.

So, if the curtain isn't also made in a valance, I cant use it... does that make sense??

Anyway, I found some super springy numbers that I loved at Lowe's.


Geometric prints aren't for everyone, but I totally felt skinnier and more summery once these puppies went up.

But remember that doorway with the full length curtains that have to match??

Ughh... that piece of crap rained on my parade.

Here's why:


Attention Window Treatment Makers of the World:

No one wants curtains that are 84 inches long... they suck, they suck, they suck.

Maybe if I lived in an attic, they might do me some good.

Of course, this brand of curtains also does not come in extra long loveliness... so, it was back to the drawing board.

I searched a bit before coming up empty handed at Target (seriously, who leaves Target with nothing?), and decided I could fix this too short curtain problem.

Now, here is the truth.

This was one of those things that I told Husband I could do and take care of, but I honest to God never imagined I could actually pull it off.

But I did.

With pillow cases from Wal-Mart because I couldn't find any fabric I liked.


I cut the pillow cases open, and figured out what I was working with... if I am going to be honest... I had no effing idea what the frick I was doing.


I kinda just made shit up as I went along.

It worked though, so whatever.


Once I finished one, I was like.. shit, how the eff am I going to make these babies line up perfectly so my anal retentive Husband doesn't make fun of me every day for the rest of my life??

So... I used the tile on the kitchen floor as a grid, and went to work on number two.


It paid off... cause those puppies match up pretty damn perfectly, and don't look half bad, if I do say so myself.


I used a billion no sew methods... I cant believe they are actually hanging up, and looking good... because I sure as hell had no clue what I was doing when I did this.

How's that for a tutorial??

Spring Into Summer

Our house looked like this around Easter...

This is in our front room, which we never use... but I decorate it anyway because it's pretty much the only room that's always clean (because we never use it).

Anyway, I got that, "Spring," sign at Tar-jay for 7 bananas and I really just think it's the cutest damn thing.

Plus, it was cheap... so I extra love it.

Truth is... even though we are kinda knocking on summer's door, I haven't taken down "spring," because I just think it's a cute freaking sign.

Rather than leave "spring," up until next March... I decided to make one of my own for summer.


It cost me 4 bucks: $2 for the fabric, $1 for the burlap, $1 for the ribbon.

I had the stencils, red paint, and glue gun on hand.

The process was not rocket science.

Make a pattern, cut out fabric, stencil letters, glue gun the whole shebang together, and then to a ribbon for hanging.

I loved this weird fabric because it reminds me of beach balls and Hawaiian shirts like my brother wears.
I was totally diggin' the potato sack look I got from the red paint and the burlap.
Peek-a-boo... do you see me?
The whole thing took me about 45 minutes, start to finish... even getting it up on the wall (thanks Husband).


Sorry, no pictures of the whole room all summer-ed out just yet... but you love the sign, right?

5/24/12

Peeing At Wal-Mart

Lovebug's favorite part about the warm weather is that he can just drop trou anywhere he damn well pleases and pee.

I know... we're working on it.

And after today... we are working on it harder.

Like, it's at the top of the friggin' list.

Why?

Oh no reason...

Just because he dropped his pants and peed in the parking lot at Wal-Mart today.

I had just put Ladybug in her car seat and was reaching for Lovebug's hand to walk him around the car to his seat, when he just dropped 'em and went.

My brain was all, "What the shit is going on right now?!"

And my mouth was all...."What are you doing?!?!"

As I threw my body in front of him, flailing like a maniac to shield him from... well... everyone (we were at Wal-Mart after all), plus... ew...

Anyway, as I threw myself in front of him he calmly looked up at me, all blue eyes and dimples and says, " I have to go pee, Mom."

Now that I am not freaking out, I can laugh about this peeing in the parking lot business... a few hours ago, not so funny... now??

Pretty damn hysterical.

I mean, we are gonna work with him on privacy, and the appropriate place to pee, and where he can be a nudist comfortably... I got it, it's all taken care of.

Another immediate priority?

 Making sure no one took our picture for that, "People Of Wal-Mart," website.

Also, adding another notch to my white trash belt... because, well... obviously I earned one today.

I guess it's true what they say... when you gotta go, you gotta go.

Husband Fed Her Pudding Last Night....

And then it came back to us twelve hours later.

Picture us dry heaving and gagging our guts out in the bathroom this morning...

On second thought... just look at the picture.


That shadow up by her head??

That is in fact, more poop.

And her poor sheets.

I haven't seen so much poop since this happened.

Lesson learned: this chick and pudding do not mix...

They erupt, like brown lava out of a tiny baby volcano.


Some people blog about their kids eating and sleeping and being cute... I prefer to blog about their bowel movements.

It's much more entertaining... don't you think??


5/23/12

29 in 29 Update

Welp.

I know my continents.

Without the help of google.

Picture me smiling and shaking my head like... YUP.

You'd be surprised how many people told me they actually couldn't spit out all 7 continents off the top of their heads.

I know this, because I asked a shit ton of people to do it.

I asked this one waiter... who was totally offended and thought I was making fun of him for his waiter-hood, and quickly told me that he has his Master's Degree.

I politely did a cheer, and a cartwheel for his Master's Degree, since clearly that's what he was expecting.

After I was again sitting right side up in my chair, I said: "So... about those continents??"

Okay, maybe it didn't happen just like that... but I do ask everyone, and some dickhead waiter did take personal offense to my asking him.

Anyway... here goes... with no googling allowed:

North America, South America, Asia, Antarctica (I always forget that one), Australia, Africa, Europe.

Now you know.

Aside from re-learning some 5th grade Geography... I also planted a garden, and saved it from being killed.

I use the word "garden" loosely.

I cut out about 50 feet of my backyard in a cool, rounded, shape-a-doodle thing.

It took for-ev-er; because of the damn kids who are always like... feed me, bath me, help I'm stuck in the vegetable drawer... just kidding (kind of).

Anyway, I cut out this whole chunk of yard, and planted inpatients... which look wimpy now, but will be full blown voluptuous women plants by the end of the summer.



Or so I'm told.

I even bought gardening gloves, cow manure, and a teeny tiny shovel for this event... so I am calling planting a garden, checked off the list yo.

Oh, and I know my goal was to not kill it myself, but... because I managed to save all of my pretty plants from this freaking giraffe...


Who is apparently hard of hearing because he ignored me each and every time I said don't run on the flowers... I think I deserve credit.


I have to admit... even though he kept attempting to murder my plants, I really like working in the yard because he loves doing it with me.

Who knew getting my hands dirty would be enjoyable??

So... that means as my horizons are growing, my list is getting smaller:

Plant a garden... check.

Stop a giraffe from killing garden... check.

This lion though, he might be harder to stop.


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